2023 NAPSTATS

9/1

@all

How did yall like THE RUSH!!!

Caught a few by surprise considering it has been in nearly every daily note…I don’t mean to stereotype but I think our non-readers aren’t going to do well this year. But that’s ok we’ll get’em learned up for sure. You can start by scrolling up, or banging this link here…called Napkin News & Notes.

http://sleeper.com/i/89LZ1pyL1QE5

I haven’t run through all the leagues yet but so far only one UBAS that I’m aware of…

🚨🚨UBAS🚨🚨

31 - it got taken…

37 - 4 pack of trolls…

Speaking of babies who can’t read, I have at least three “adopted children” who didn’t notice the must be 18 sign and all I ask is that you legit tell your parents you are in this league. Please don’t make me ask for a signed permission slip…you know who you are. I know who you are. I’d prefer everything be above board should one of somehow pull off the win.

Before I explain THE SNOOZE let me reiterate that trades are open (and being monitored)…I’d like to ironically remind our non-readers that one of the “GOYAADi Rules” is I can’t use FAAB against you, so all those Brandon Cooks plus FAAB Buck trades you’re offering for Bijan or Jacobs AND DHop, thanks, those were fun to see.

FAMOUS FOR OUR TROLLS 😉

Finally…THE SNOOZE…

This is the last you will hear from me before 9/6…that’s the day I have decided to pick the winners of the PROJECTION PAR-TAY. Because I can get winners in the mail before the weekend.

PROJECTION PARTY

If you have a 200+ projection for week 1 throw it in the Tournament Chat (link below) for a chance to win one of two silver eagles. Highest verified projection will win one, and we’ll pick one random winner from everyone else in the 2HUNDRED Club.

I know yall are tired of hearing from me at this point and I’ll just say the absence will make both hearts grow fonder.

See yall after my 4 days of darkness retreat.

👍

8/30

@all

IT’S THE FI-NAL COUNT DOWNNNN

Leagues that are still drafting…you are the only ones getting NNN tonight…

After the pause tonight, all of the leagues will have their pick times reduced to the following schedule to ensure all leagues finish within 12 hours.

1 Round Left - 1 Hour
2 Rounds Left - 30 Minutes
3 Rounds Left - 20 Minutes
4 Rounds Left - 15 Minutes
5-6 Rounds Left - 10 Minutes
7-10 Rounds Left - 5 Minutes

Set a Queue and put yourself on auto if you have to. This weekend the Sleeper app is going to have it’s highest volume of the season…and we are all going to relax while everyone else freaks about drafting JT-Jeudy while the app glitches in their high stakes fast drafts…

Speaking of JT-Jeudy rosters…I have three of em…so when you see my teams “Jeudy JT son”,”Jane, His Wife”, or “His Boy, Elroy!”…we all know what’s up…

Welcome to…THE RUSH!!!

👍

8/30

@all

PRIZES!!!

Now that I have your attention…let’s talk about…PRIZES!!!

Alright…first up…

“THE” NAPKIN

OVERALL WINNER - aka the league champion who scores the most points in WK 15-16-17 among our 100 league champions - gets a KILO of MEXICAN NOSE CA…I mean SILVER…in the shape of a Tecmo Bowl NES Cartridge.

SECRET BONUS

An ACTUAL Tecmo Bowl NES Cartridge (for scale)

DOUBLE SECRET BONUS

Whoa…a double secret

The BABY NAPKIN

REGULAR SEASON POINTS CHAMP - Team with the most points total from WK 1 to WK 14 receives a one ounce Tecmo Shaped Cartridge

TRADING NAPKINS

The Overall Winner & Regular Season Points Champ will receive a Custom Trading Napkins celebrating their victories.

The Team with the Highest Score each week of the Regular Season (1-14) will receive a FULL Custom Trading Napkin. I will reach out to the winner and if you give me some type of prompt (like Star Wars, or Air Jordan) I will make it happen. And if you don’t give me a prompt, I make whatever I want (like Jimi, or Brunt…Jabba Brunt…00255).

The Team with the most Cumulative points each week of the Regular Season (2-13, 1 is the same as above, 14 is Baby Napkin) gets one of my Jokers, Aces, or Kings…because I like poker.

SILVER EAGLES

PROJECTION PAR-TAY CHAMP - The Team with the Highest Week 1 Projection (That is entered in the Tourney Chat) gets a one ounce American Silver Eagle coin

2HUNDRED CLUB - For the rest of us, anyone with a 200+ Week 1 Projection (That is entered in the Tourney Chat) will be randomly drawn from a hat with your names written on paper like we’re picking draft order the day of TNF…I’m going to record this beast by noon that day so I can get the video out before the game.

http://sleeper.com/i/89LZ1pyL1QE5

It’s the one titled 2023 NAPKIN TOURNEY CHAT (Not the Elvis ones…yer killin’ me smalls.)

POKER?

I’m thinking by Week 2 I can get my Poker Club back up and running. If I can fill say 4 or more tables each week we’ll put a Silver Eagle up for this too (WK 2-13, I got stuff to test week 1…and Playoff Prep week 14…).

CLOCKS DROP TOMORROW NIGHT AFTER PAUSE SO ALL LEAGUES FINISH BY EOD FRIDAY SEPTEMBER 1.

👍

8/29

Hello @all

Early lunchbreak news and notes…

“Pretty babies” last two leagues held back “just in case” but some RSVPs haven’t shown up. These are the last two undrafted leagues…any/all can join on the house. Have to kick these off today or will keep them open to be renamed in 2024. I’ll check around quitting time today and if they are full I will kick them off.

20 - 2/12

http://sleeper.com/i/V6EVxV5RxPe3

26 - 8/12

http://sleeper.com/i/EwGQj457WKML

(They filled in like 30 seconds…ty sirs/ma’am)

PROJECTION PARTY

If you have a 200+ projection for week 1 throw it in the Tournament Chat (link below) for a chance to win one of two silver eagles. Highest verified projection will win one, and we’ll pick a random winner from everyone else in the 2HUNDRED Club.

http://sleeper.com/i/89LZ1pyL1QE5

What if my draft hasn’t ended? I’ll keep the PROJECTION PARTY open until TNF and will “draw” and announce winners right before game time.

And if you have a really low projection…go ahead and throw it in anyway, when you win the whole tournament you can point to how wrong Sleeper is. Maybe I can think of a consolation price for our worst projected team. Mercury dime maybe…

Reminder. Clocks drop Friday Sept 1 to finish all drafts that day.

👍

8/27

Helllllloooooo All!

Did you miss NAPKIN NEWS yesterday?

You don’t know what NAPKIN NEWS is…I see…welp, if you get the gumption…

https://goyaadi.fit/legend/2023-rules

Some questions that have popped up.

Are there IR spots? NO

Why not? It takes too much to police it and keep people from ‘illegally’ having an extra roster spot. All about fairness here.

Did you make those new T Shirts? YUP

What’s a Median Game? Nothing, what’s a median with you? A MEDIAN GAME is an EXTRA WIN or LOSS each week where you play against your league median (which is the average of the 6th and 7th best scores that week)

What should I do when someone asks how they have two losses in week one? You should laugh to yourself, then let me know so we can laugh together, then we’ll point them here…where they’ll realize that, yes, we were laughing about it.

What’s a PROJECTION PARTY? Hey man, when the drafts over, I like to have a little party. We have a tournament chat (link below), everyone throw your WEEK ONE PROJECTION into the chat (if you care to) and we’ll see who is the KING OF THE DRAFT.

http://sleeper.com/i/89LZ1pyL1QE5 (Yes, I put the wrong link in the chat at first)

Last year I gave out mascots to the highest projection. However, since Sleeper axed Mascots and made them Avatars, I’m going to come up with something else. Probably a Silver American Eagle, since I am a coin nerd and keep a few at home to play with. Plus…Murica baby!

Speaking of babies…the UBAS has slowed to a trickle, and while we’ll inevitably have a few turds who drop after drafting a full squad, I’d just like to thank you all for making UBAS so damn effective and keeping our leagues active…and FULL. Without you all, I’m certain I would have had to nuke a league. We are at 100% capacity right now and I have a hard time seeing that changing. That’s all you…and I mean it that I appreciate every single person that took on an ugly baby.

Please note, any draft not done by Sept 1 will have clocks adjusted to finish THAT DAY.

Yall stay cool!

👍

8/25

Hello @all …little early since it’s Friday and apparently not too many “readers” in the tournament. I kid.

The overall winner gets a THOUSAND DOLLAR TROPHY made from a KILO of SILVER.

Say that again?

The overall winner…nm…If you thought this was JUST a free league, get caught up.

https://goyaadi.fit/legend/napkins

There might be other dope stuff you didn’t know you could win, like custom Trading Napkins…😉

If your league is done drafting…take a look at the teams list and make sure someone hasn’t dropped after realizing they built a dough boy team in The NAPKIN. LMK if you see that and we’ll get UBAS…engaged.

Already got one…

Which is great for people who realize that, going forward, there will only be 100 leagues, and if you do well enough you get to keep your seat.

If you avoid the Toilet Bowl, or win the Toilet Bowl, you get to keep your seat in The NAPKIN for free! Next year, there will be a cover charge for anyone who has not “earned” their spot (aka top 8 plus TB winner).

Basically, as long as you can field a team good enough…you can have a chance at a THOUSAND DOLLAR TROPHY every year for zero dollars. And if inflation keeps the current pace, it might be a TEN THOUSAND DOLLAR TROPHY soon.

This will help make The NAPKIN the SLOWEST drafting HIGHEST scoring SHARPEST* Tournament in the World.

And to make sure we all get better. I’ll give you all the success metrics I can get my hands on, just like last year.

👍

8/24

Welcome again all…keeping it short and sweet since we don’t have any new leagues today.

NOTE: The clock pauses at night but you can still make picks

If you took extra teams (or just feel like throwing me two bucks for the good time) you can tap the store link and scroll to the first item. New T Shirt designs are ready and will be posted this weekend.

I’m not going to spam you with my store link every day, don’t worry…

For anyone who missed the memo, if you are in a league that starts with NAPKIN, these leagues have not had a champion. If you are that champ, we’ll replace NAPKIN with your name…forever…

The NAPKIN…

WHERE LEGENDS MAKE THEMSELVES

👍

8/23

LET THE TOURNAMENT BEGIN!!!!

All 100 leagues filled*

Why the asterisk? Technically, I’m the type that likes to “keep one in the chamber”…just in case…whether it’s the Swedish Bikini Team in desperate need of a morale boost through fantasy football, high net worth investors who need to “try before they buy”, or a bear high on cocaine…when those situations come up, it’s always good to have one extra shot…

With that stated eloquently…LET’S GO!

NEW LEAGUES! Welcome…I send notes every night, get caught up if you like.

FYI - YOU CAN STILL PICK DURING THE NIGHTLY PAUSES

If your league is not making at least two rounds a day @ me so me and UBAS can come pick you up. Slow drafts are great bc you can have a life, but if you are missing picks constantly you are out.

You can @ me any time I am on the clock I will make a pick quickly.

PLEASE NOTE: Sleeper is putting updates out that crash notifications for hour stretches it seems. Always @ the next picker when you can because it will show up in a nice list in the mentions. To find these tap the top left where the circle with your avatar is, can’t miss it.

Ugly Baby Adopters…YOU are the REAL HEROES of the draft. Leagues that had drops and boots, the reason we didn’t lose more of you is because a bunch of folks have stepped up to draft and manage actively. Happy to give you folks extra shots at my NAPKIN.

Finally, when all the drafts are done, if you did take on extra teams (or just feel like helping me support MISSION 22, NEXT for AUTISM, and my local food panty) feel free to bang one of these links. I recommend waiting until after the drafts finish so you can tally up and make sure no leagues get nuked (plus I’ll have the rest of the T Shirts up by then)

https://goyaadi.fit/store/2023napkin

I appreciate all of you, and more than appreciate your help making this the SLOWEST drafting HIGHEST scoring GREATEST Tournament in the World (now in 28 countries)

👍

8/22

88 leagues filled…Roads? Where we’re going, we don’t need roads…

Welcome all…to The NAPKIN

For those who haven’t been with us long, I’d recommend you get caught up on Tournament News & Notes here:

https://sleeper.app/topic/867500967531331584/979553683388108800

We do have a our own Tournament Chat Room in Sleeper. If you want to meet with members from other leagues and/or prove that they exist…feel free to join.

Album Cover T Shirts will be in the Store soon for anyone who wants a keepsake…and if you took some extra teams I’ll post that link at the end of all the drafts.

Speaking of extra teams…there are 11 left. They will be gone in about 3 days. If you want more teams and to save me some legwork…feel free to jump in early (it’s a bit of a scroll to the open leagues)

https://www.fantasypros.com/2021/08/free-agent-acquisition-budget-faab-primer-2021-fantasy-football/

You all may have noticed I like to quote famous sayings…regarding all of our clock arguments, let me leave this here…

“I’d always end up broken down on the highway. When I stood there trying to flag someone down, nobody stopped. But when I pushed my own car, other drivers would get out and push with me. If you want help, help yourself – people like to see that.” - Chris Rock

If I jump in a chat room and everyone is yelling that “the guy on the clock isn’t picking”, but nobody has given them an @mention…I’mma give you the Chris Rock look…and if that don’t work, maybe Will Smith…

I joke. No fighting here bc it isn’t necessary. Every league should have 12 cool people, and we should all have a grand ol’ time winning Napkins.

@ me tho if your league is stuck. With Ugly Baby Adoption Service - “we’ll pick ya up”

👍

For those new to “FAAB” waivers…

8/21

Welcome All!

Only 18 leagues left to fill…and The NAPKIN is now in 27 countries although in one case the croatia guy is also the netherlands guy who is travelling. But hot dog! 26 countries! An alphabets worth…

If you want to invite your foreign pen pal to grow our country list, links to the remaining leagues will be here, and you will probably have to scroll down a lot…

https://goyaadi.fit/buddybets

We’ve also had some good healthy smack talk going down, I’ve already put two bets into my buddy bets tracker and if you want to make care free bets with your friends and have proof no one can deny…take a peek (it is behind a sign in wall, while it is free, if that’s not your jam don’t click this one)

Some of you could use these (no judgment)

And if you want to know way too much about how last season went…

If you want to know what is going on in 2023, bang this one, which I update a few days behind with the most recent news.

Finally, for newer leagues who didn’t know, when people drop or get booted, I put those teams up for adoption via the Ugly Baby Adoption Service or UBAS, these are free extra tickets beyond the first team free. You can grab as many of these as you want (if you are fastest).

Taking this beast worldwide, thanks for supporting early.

👍

8/20

Welcome boys and girl! For new NAP leagues who kicked off this weekend…get caught up…

For existing leagues…oops…there’s only 22 left. I went on a bit of a rush today and filled the OG leagues plus a few.

I think they might all fill…and I wouldn’t have had a chance at doing that without you draft heroes adopting my ugly babies. The Uggly Baby Adoption Service has surpassed any expectations for 2023. Much appreciated. Great work! No baby left behind.

For those few who asked, tickets are up for those having extra fun, and I did figure out how to get the album covers onto some T $hirts, hope to post those soon.

(Not the guy in the pictures, you’ll see me in the grand welcome video)

https://goyaadi.fit/legend/report-card

First Team is FREE for folks I just scared…and if you grabbed extras before you knew because you aren’t a big reader, the owner said it’s cool.

I did get a heads up from Metrics Jim who will be feeding the data to the report card, which will be your one stop shop for Tournament Standings. Take a spin so you know how it works…

Finally, I hope you noticed there are no ads on my site. I keep it that way intentionally. I’m not in it for the money…I’m in to make it the greatest…

👍

8/19

Welcome all!

As some drafts wind down I see folks are jonesing for more…

If you wanted extra teams with no perceived obligation to pay…consider joining the OG 22 from last season, I donate $2 to Mission 22 for each team drafted. You can also join any of the 23+ numbered leagues that are still open if you want a chance to get your name on a league and don’t mind parting with two digital George Washington’s for me to give somewhere else.

*Since these leagues are from last year there is an extra step to “assign” you. I’ll get you but if you are waiting @ me.

These leagues have folks waiting for the most part and are ready to draft immediately.

Because I am who I am, cue Popeye, gonna go for all 100 leagues filled. Why set a goal and not go for it right? Please feel free to invite active managers into the SLOWEST drafting HIGHEST scoring TOURNAMENT in the WORLD! (probably)

And if you do bring a friend in who wants to be in the same league as you but you already have a first team free, go for it, the owner said it’s cool.

I really appreciate those who have already donated. It actually caught me off guard and I hadn’t turned on one-click checkout. Doing that today as well as enabling those links for those of you inclined to click them.

👍

8/18

Alright boys and girl. The final push. I won’t be sending mass notes like this over the weekend since I will be teaching my robot how to copy and paste the link when I update this ~100 times for me…(it’s just selenium…download it, it’s free)

This weekend I will put the links up to the remaining leagues here: https://goyaadi.fit/legend/2023-leagues

If you want more shots at The NAPKIN, pick leagues 1-22 which I guarantee will fill, and if you want to fill up any other leagues for me (like 23 did) go for it.

I’ll be kicking off those drafts as soon I can get them filled and once I do that 22 more times…I’m pouring myself a tall glass of milk for a job well done.

Milk, the other white meat…speaking of milk…the Ugly Baby Adoption Service has nearly fulfilled its duties for 2023 and will take a long doula nap (is that a thing?), maybe au pere nap…either way…HOLY “COW” you all came through this year!! Here at The NAPKIN, we love all our babies, no matter how ugly 👍

The reason The NAPKIN is special is because every league is filled with maniacs who wanna take my trophies, and I wouldn’t want my tournament filled with anyone else. Because this can’t be the coolest tournament in the world if it’s not filled with cool people, and I really appreciate all of you cool people making it happen.

Thank you all…and good luck.

👍

You’re gonna need it 🤓📊

It takes a while to load…maybe tap that FF RANKER button from week 8…

https://goyaadi.fit/legend/2023-napkin

If you’re league ain’t movin’, make sure you are telling the next pick they are otc “on the clock” ⏰🕰️🕚⏱️ and @GOYAADi if we get stuck and YOU CAN MAKE PICKS while the draft is paused at night, only the timer is paused yall 😉

8/17

This is it folks…I’ve riled enough trolls for one preseason…I’m going to close out the “draftraising” portion of this tournament this weekend and fill out the OG22 (aka last year’s leagues that are mostly full still).

I’ll leave additional leagues open to fill for any of you who want more shots or want to bring in a friend, but the Troll locks are now engaged and I’d recommend just waiting for free adoptions.

Because…we still have a few in the tourney but if they can be cool we’ll take their best efforts. And I accidentally booted 3 folks who were legit…so who knows? Still time for a fourth I guess

WHAT TO EXPECT REST OF SEASON

END OF DRAFT

Free agency opens immediately.
Trades can now be made (I’m 👀).
$2 buster. First team is free and I subsidize adopted babies, but if you grabbed a few extra you can look around The $tore or just go straight to the tickets and add’em to your cart, then go to cart and checkout.
The words expected or required are not used here, if you feel you got your dollars worth and are able…thank you for your support.

REGULAR SEASON

Weekly Trading Napkins - weekly highest score gives me a prompt and I make a custom one and if I don’t get a response I make whatever I want
Sunday Zoom/Poker (Time/Frequency/Prize TBD)
FAAB - $300, spend it
MEDIAN GAME - you play 2 games each week, a head to head, and one against the average of the 6th and 7th best scores that week. It keeps the good teams with bad luck in contention and bad teams with good luck out of the playoffs…
There are 2 games each week…didn’t I just say that?? Yeah…2 GAMES EACH WEEK…I’ll still get fifty questions…
WORKOUT CHALLENGE - No one likes working out…I get it. I’m still gonna try.
Most points scored in the Regular Season wins the BABY NAPKIN which is a one ounce bar of silver…

TOP 4 MAKE PLAYOFFS

“GOYAADi Swap” is back! If any of my teams make the playoffs, but a team in that league did not make it AND scores more points, you just got swapped in to the playoffs friendo…don’t mess it up.

BOTTOM 4 MAKE TOILET BOWL

If you are in the toilet bowl…3 of you are getting the 🥾 and will have to buy back in for N24…Winner stays free, see below

WEEK 15 KNOCKOUT ROUND

The only single elimination round in the tournament…My best two teams got knocked out along with the other 3 teams in the top 5. Don’t know how that helps you but it is information.

WEEK 16-17 TWO WEEK CHAMPIONSHIP

Yup. Two weeks. No fluke champions….

LEAGUE CHAMP WITH MOST POINTS SCORED IN 15-16-17 GETS THE TROPHY

As long as you avoid the Toilet Bowl you will have your seat(s) renewed for free each year of this tournament. Only newcomers will have to pay to get in, so welcome all…as an early supporter, if you are good enough…you can keep your teams free for as long as you can keep them.

Welcome to The NAPKIN

8/16

Welcome All! Welcome New Leagues…WELCOME!

NAPKIN 23 is alive! And over 600 teams across 17 countries have begun drafting in hopes of winning The NAPKIN…

There can be only one…

https://goyaadi.fit/legend/2023-rules

For those new to The NAPKIN, maybe take a peek at these if you aren’t a reader…

And if you are a HUGE stat nerd…give it a minute to load and geek out…2022 Metrics

https://goyaadi.fit/legend/report-card

We keep track of standings in the Report Card:

This year looks like WINAMP, and not dog poo excel…

This weekend I will be reposting the links to the final 20 leagues. If you have a friend that wants to join but wants to be in the same league as you, tell him/her the owner said it’s cool. My thanks for bringing another active player.

Also…all the album covers are at the bottom of this page, you may have to scroll past 100 leagues. I was told to put the Leagues UNDER the album covers and I think I will take that advice this weekend. Either way, links to the final 20 will be here (this weekendish), and I will begin filling them ASFAP next week.

https://goyaadi.fit/legend/2023-swarms

For anyone doing best ball large fields like the milly…this is not fantasy advice and I am not a fantasy advisor…but maybe double check my math. 😉

https://goyaadi.fit/legend/pigs-meter

Better on desktop but “works” on mobile. Triple tap on the field to enter the first player and your keyboard will pull up and begin autofilling when you type…

See you in the milly maker finals…

In the very near future, all of these notes will be stored here and a notification will go out in the league chat via a Selenium script I am working on…🤓

For those who asked, the $2 for extra teams goes to the link below, and for those who didn’t know only the first team was free I heard the owner was cool, just shoot him an awkward 👍

https://goyaadi.fit/workouts

You also owe me a workout…

I joke…Good luck all!

🥾

8/13

First FULL week in the books…Day 10 ish

Are you feeling the buzz? The energy is definitely starting to build and we are slowly winning over some doubters.

T Shirts are up. If you find yourself having so much fun that you need a shirt to let everyone know about it…peep the store.

https://goyaadi.fit/legend/napkins

This tournament tho…is not about trying to get your money, it’s about crafting the greatest SHARPEST tournament in the world, and all that other stuff will come. The NAPKIN will be on the map in the not distant future, and all of you are on the ground floor.

I really appreciate you all being a part of that, and please understand will always be the goal. Plus you can win your own Trading Napkin if you done real good.

The NAPKIN…

WHERE LEGENDS MAKE THEMSELVES

(👆 They done real good)

Speaking of the ground floor…people keep leaving these ugly babies on mine and if you would be so kind as to want to adopt and care for that baby, please hit me with the bat symbol 👍 in the DM and I’ll hit send the next one your way.

These free teams are first come first serve so I can’t guarantee they will last longer than 90 seconds.

Which is awesome, and how I know all the BS I said earlier will come true.

Leagues 64-100 are live and several have finished drafting…and with our 20 some carry overs that puts our tournament roughly halfway filled ahead of schedule.

I’m chilling this week so expect less words…which will be here from now on…

NEWNaps, drafts pause 11-9 for sleepy sleeps, NAPKIN ## leagues get renamed for who wins the first season…it could be you 🫵

👍

8/12

Welcome to The NAPKIN all! NNN coming at ya!

For anyone who missed it, you might want to check these. Still early in a lot of drafts…

http://sleeper.com/i/V6V30OZMk67o

For our New NapFolks please note that any tournament named NAPKIN ## is open to be won. If you win your league, it gets renamed after you…The NAPKIN

WHERE LEGENDS MAKE THEMSELVES

Of course, we are also

FAMOUS FOR OUR TROLLS

Which is why I appreciate all of you participating in the ugly baby adoption service to keep things moving. We had our second premature 🥾, and out of at least 30 that is a pretty good accuracy rating.

If you love ugly babies and want the next one hit me with a 👍 in the DM and I’ll drop links to those folks first. If it seems like I am skipping you send me a fresh thumb as that is my bat symbol for adoptions.

Appreciate all of you for joining, thank you for making this the SLOWEST drafting HIGHEST scoring GREATEST Tournament in the World!!!

(Probably)

👍

8/11

Welcome to The NAPKIN all…NNN coming at ya (Nightly Napkin News* for the uninitiated)

Leagues 71-100 are off…and a 4 pack of teams between 1-23 are now drafting. We are now about to achieve ‘stasis’ by finishing the same number of drafts we kickoff each day…the answer, is 31 live at a time…

Some quick hit notes

DM me a 👍 if you want to be on the adoption list and get links to the next freebies that come available. If you’ve been waiting, hit me again.
TShirts are going up this weekend if you have something you want let me know, can design for your softball (or pickleball) teams, things like that…or if you just want a Napkin Jerzee…the first ones came out well
Yes. If you bring a friend to the tournament you can play with them (even if you already have a team) bc it helps me fill leagues with active players
One per friend 😉

If you see me on auto, give me a buddy heads up…

Or not, you are all trying to win The NAPKIN

Home of the Single Play 50 Burger

Now serving!

👍

8/10

Welcome to N23 all…

ASSIMILATE!

Welcome again NAPVets and newNAPs…for our new NAPKIN leagues welcome, and one of your names will replace NAPKIN and be YOUR NAME 88, like league 1 aka GOYAADi 1, or GOYAADi 8, or GOYAADi 17…

Or JMURRAY 12, who won League 12 and is one of two folks really giving me an unexpected second set of hands with the troll patrol. Big ups to 6Shooter (spelled with numbers) as well.

If you see either of them hit them with a 👍 and the lumberjack head nod

KUDOS to league 100 for being the first to finish. Last year that would have meant a bundle of mascots dropped in the chat for everyone to share but instead be stolen by one dude who bailed, gave me the finger, and now just kind of hangs around. I haven’t figured out Sleeper’s “avatars” yet so we’ll see if we can make that happen again…

Thanks again for keeping the ugly baby adoption service going smoothly. If you want the next team that comes free from a boot hit me with a 👍 in the DM and I’ll start sending links there.

Slow troll day other than one dude who is probably still alive thanks to the boot bc damn that was a lot…

I lied double troll…pick 6 and 10 just happened

Taking another breather from draftraising tonight but if you need a league for a friend I’ll hit you with tomorrow’s list.

Appreciate all your help and participation making this the SLOWEST drafting HIGHEST scoring SMOOTHEST running GREATEST tournament in the WORLD

(probably)

👍

8/9

Welcome all! Nightly Napkin News coming at ya a bit early…

5 leagues filled today…and one of them filled themselves…way to go 23…good stuff!

That brings us to 27/100 live drafting with League 100 about to make the turn to the final round, likely being our first to finish. See…it happens…they end…it just feels long until we get the 🥾🥾🥾 out of the way.

Speaking of which, thank you all for alerting me and helping me keep this cool by not wasting a league full of people’s time.

Shout out to everyone picking up orphans (slow orphan day…trolls must be regrouping…but they’ll be back, and in greater number). 12 Active Managers in Every League. The spirit of the NAPKIN.

The NAPKIN has also achieved a few tag lines, beyond being slowest drafting and highest scoring we are also HOME OF THE SINGLE PLAY 50 BURGER. If you didn’t take the opportunity…there may still be time.

We are, of course,

FAMOUS FOR OUR TROLLS…

and if you count yourself among them I will turn you into lifelong friends if you aren’t careful…👍 I love everyone, but I PREFER a smooth running FAIR tournament.

I highly recommend NOT trying to ‘advertise’ any of my leagues in the sleeper feed…just trust me. If you need/want that ping me, let me take those bullets you just enjoy your time here.

100 Leagues…eventually…I try to keep everything running smoothly by just following a strict process but ultimately it is not error proof. If you see me on autodraft in a league hit me with a buddy DM like “hey buddy, you’re auto in xx”.

Or not…

I mean you are trying to win right?? All’s fair as long as everyone’s cool. This is…

THE TOURNAMENT THAT PLAYS AGAINST YOU…

But also has a heart of gold with our adoption service…If you want a second free shot at The NAPKIN hit me with a 👍 in the DM and I’ll send you the next baby.

Leagues that start with NAPKIN who only read the bottom…if you win the league the first year, it gets named after you.

Welcome again all, there are about 400 active competitors in the league making us 1/3 Ready to Rock. Thank you for joining NAPKIN 23

👍

8/8

Welcome all! I did not have time to build the daily update page today but we are now up to 23 leagues drafting…eclipsing last year’s total, and we still have 20 leagues from last year that are still mostly full. I don’t mean to get cocky but I think 100 full leagues might just happen.

And of course, I couldn’t do that without all of you cool people. The ‘adoption agency’ may one day go down as a Paradigm Shifting innovation but until then I am just really appreciative that so many of you think this is cool. That’s the ultimate goal. Coolest Tournament of all Time. I appreciate all your help with that.

Folks who want additional teams or who have a friend who wants to join, hit me with a 👍 via DM and I’ll send you an orphan when one comes up, or put you and friend on a new league. You can join him/her as my thanks for spreading the word, the owner said it’s cool 😉

I took the night off from “draftraising” and will be hanging back just watching for my turn a bit and seeing who’s making fun or mad at my picks.

NEWER LEAGUES

You may or may not be aware of the 🥾

I get no joy out of booting people (usually) bc it is a bad look generally. But I do want the clock to run and everyone to be an active participant to keep it moving at an “appropriate pace”. @ me if this is not happening.

If curious, so far only one 🥾 has been premature and I am working with that dude for a league tomorrow….whoops, but still a good error rate overall.

👍

8/7

I think I put the wrong date on yesterday’s…anyway…welcome to the NAPKIN new leagues! This is a daily note that will soon just be a link and a few bullets so you don’t have to see my brain dump in the chat.

We are welcoming 3 more leagues today. 84-86 filled smoothly (mostly*) with a prework-lunch-post work cadence that if continued will easily fill our remaining leagues.

There are 100 leagues, and 78 of them are “available” aka new. I say available because here at The NAPKIN if you win the league the first season, it gets named after you. Forever.

The NAPKIN…Where Legends Make Themselves

(Veteran League Champs, gimme a shout if you are ready to draft and I can fill your remaining spot or two, got a few ready for tomorrow)

Speaking of Legends…there are a few folks really giving me a hand with our “Troll Reduction Process” via the adoption service. The NAPKIN is unfortunately famous for it’s trolls. And these draft heroes have adopted all manner of smelly rosters to ensure the leagues have 12 active managers. Plus they are free chances to win…since you are helping me and the tournament and the ten other assumed dudes we can ignore the $2 add’l team thing.

Please wait until after the drafts to pay for tickets, I’ll put a link out, honor code no dude dates here, and if your choice is food or me…pick food. Anything made goes to charity (I choose Mission 22 and my local food pantry typically) and I make my annual contribution on week 1 Thursday kickoff. If this starts blowing up I’ll pay anything crazy forward to the next tournament’s trophy and shenanigans.

Last thing you can pretend to have read…I assume you have all seen at least one of the “album covers” that I post in the FF feed. If you thought any were particularly good (or bad so I avoid) let me know and I’ll bump that up the rotation.

Yall stay cool…

👍

8/6

Sorry, not a video…just typy types.

3 more leagues kicked off today, bringing us to 14 live in draft. We have 22 carry overs making our tournament about a third filled. Not bad for 4 days of work.

Like many I work a M-F so I will target 2-3 leagues per day counting down from 87 over the next week, feel free to let friends know, links are all at the league list link.